Being An Empath

What does this even mean?!

To me, I have no fucking clue.

For most of my life I never really knew what this meant and today I still don’t really know. However, I’m starting to understand more about what it is and I want to know more!

I’ve been told by many people, throughout my life, that I’m an empath. I’ve kind of shrugged it off because I feel that everyone is an empath but when I came back from Mt. Shasta, I realized I’m not like everyone else. I can go balls to the wall with risk taking activities in the 3D life like racing street bikes, skydiving, ground launching/speed flying, and drinking black coffee with the Swedes but now when it comes to being around a lot of random people with overwhelming energy, the fear comes out and I hide in my shell, like a little turtle.

I really do absorb a lot of energy from my surroundings, especially since my awakening. It’s as if the internal filter of energy had been lifted from me and chucked into the spiritual trash can. I guess these filters are the unconscious boundaries people normally have towards other people’s energy. And well, I don’t have that anymore, which kind of sucks, A LOT.

Now I get really overwhelmed and almost want to cry when I’m exposed to energy that doesn’t resonate with me, especially when I’m in crowded places where there are tons of different energies going on that’s negative, nasty and just plain destructive. And I don’t like that shit, because I don’t like to feel other people’s shit since I have my own and my twin’s to deal with and I don’t like to get emotional. I don’t even have to think about what’s going on around me, I can just feel it. It didn’t have much impact on me years ago, as I was trotting along in life just fine, most of the time. But damn, now it’s blown up in my face, ten fold, and I can’t ignore it now no matter what I do

It makes sense as to why I enjoy more alone time, in nature and only around like minded people as opposed to how extrovert I used to be around all sorts of random people. It also explains why I feel good at Starbucks early in the morning and then start to notice how shitty I feel later on. I will be really focused on something but then have to stop because I feel shitty. Then I look up and see all sorts of people crowding around. Then I think, “Oh, this is why.”

I know I’m not the only person who feels this way. And it’s crazy because I never really understood “psychic abilities” until now. I feel things and people’s energy on a much deeper level without them even saying a word to me.

Do I think this is a cool ability to have? Fuck no. But that’s just because I don’t know how to harness any of it. They say being an empath is awesome because you can sense people really easily, regardless of how they dress and how they represent their personality. Basically, you can see past the bullshit right on the spot. However, if you don’t know how to control these abilities, they become your kryptonite. And well it’s definitely my kryptonite.

So if you are an empath, please leave a comment. I’m really trying to harness the shit out of this and so far, I’m doing well only because I’m in Sedona, Arizona at the moment, where the energies are beyond amazing here.

 

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